Hello Nessa and Ryan. I guess my email isn’t really a question but I just want some sort of confirmation that I have the right to be mad and upset. My wife, who is on birth control, was having sex with me about 2 months ago and said, “Please do not cum in me, it feels gross.” I immediately stopped having sex because I was pissed and left the room. The next time we had sex, she said the same thing again. This time I didn’t really want to stop though, so I pulled out and came on her. Since then, I have had sex a few more times and I have had to either pull out and cum in my own hand or on top of her stomach. If I cum on her stomach she makes sounds like, “Ehhhhhh”. Is this normal? Do I have a right to be pissed off?
By the way, I have been married for 8 years and up until a few months ago, I have always came inside her and she never showed any signs of being grossed out by my cum.
Yes, you have a right to be pissed off! After eight years of marriage you would think that she would be used to seeing, feeling, and tasting your cum.
My feeling towards Ryan’s cum is this: I love it. I don’t want to see it wadded on a piece of toilet paper to be flushed down the toilet when I can have it in my mouth or being absorbed in my pussy or ass. I don’t want to see it on the floor or the table or the stairs (yes, it’s been to all those places before). His cum is not his, it’s mine. Even after I’ve drained him dry and his balls are already creating more juice for me, it’s all mine. His cum represents life, my love for him, his most sacred fluid and I am the only person in the world who can have it. No one can make it shoot from his body except for me. If he wanted to jack off (and I make sure he cums once a day minimum) and cum, he has to get permission from me or I feel totally disrespected. I changed my whole attitude towards his cum, but with that, I would now be upset if he wastes it or makes it less special than my mind has made it. That’s the difference between me not caring where he cums, to now caring, so I want to be a part of his orgasms, always. If he makes his cum unimportant or something he can just jack off by himself and wipe on an old napkin, then why the hell should I think it’s special and want it in me? I choose where it goes in my body. I love the taste, the warmth of it as it leaves his body and shoots onto me. If it’s on my face, I wipe it clean and lick my fingers. I feel lucky to be the only person with whom he can share the vulnerable moment when his semen leaves his body. Taking his cum in me is just one way for me to show that I love him.
To hear that your wife doesn’t want it in her pisses me off. That is the most extreme opposite of how I feel. I know for a fact that a man loves to see his woman take his cum and swallow it, play with it, rub it on herself, and just enjoy his hot load as it squirts out. Just like in porn, the final scene is always the cum scene because it’s the perfect way to end a sex session. She’ll either swallow it, rub it on her tits, or play with it in her mouth. That’s what men look for. If your wife can’t do what emotionless adult stars can do, there is something wrong with her. Husbands and wives should not only love each others’ flaws, bodies, and bad habits, but also the juices made during sex. After eight years she suddenly wants you to stop showing her your cum? That doesn’t add up. Something is wrong on her end and the “no cum” attitude is just the starting point. Don’t let it turn into resentment and hate because that’s where it’s heading.
Yes, you have the right to be pissed off. That is insane. I do not agree with the following either, but I can at least understand why a woman wouldn’t swallow. Sometimes mentally, a taste and texture can just make a person gag or absolutely not want something in their mouth, and although I disagree (grow up and get over it), I get it. However, to request that she doesn’t want you to cum inside her vagina because it feels gross is just an absolute slap to the face. Unless she is off birth control and worried she may get pregnant, that is just flat out unacceptable in my opinion. I’d go as far as to say, that is a red flag for the beginning of a divorce, being out of love, and/or her being unfaithful. A person who begins to bond with someone else will turn their loyalty against you, just to show the other person they are now loyal to them. Not letting you cum inside her would be a huge loyalty move/ease guilt with her new prospect. This may be a huge assumption but the least you can do is check up on things and make sure you are still the only person on her radar. Cum doesn’t get gross 8 years later, especially when cum inside the vagina is as old as people exist. She is alive because of that “gross” act.
Your cum is an extension of your body and manhood, to be told it’s gross is equivalent to you saying to her, “Can you please put this bag on your head while we have sex, you gross me out. In fact, keep it on all day and only take it off when I am not around. I do not want to be reminded that I actually sleep with you.”
Dumb right? Look into your relationship. If you are messing up and have stopped giving her the attention she needs, make those changes. Something isn’t right. A woman in love wants her man inside her. In fact, I’d say a woman truly in love wants her man’s fluids inside her, just as much as she wants to kiss him deeply and share saliva, hold hands, look into his eyes, and cuddle him all night so every germ on his body becomes part of her. Not to mention it goes against every instinct in our bones. I know people use protection and condoms, but in this case, it isn’t about that. She called your sperm gross inside her. EIther she is the most insensitive woman on earth or something is up.