50 Cent’s Opening Pitch of a Mets Game – Worst Pitch Ever

50 CentRyan: Go to YouTube and look up “50 Cent first pitch Mets.” Prepare to laugh. Then, once you see that and laugh, go to Google images, lol

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Nessa: lolololol omg. He was even FACING the batter and STILL managed to throw that motherfucker like a foul ball.

Ryan: LOL.  Now look at the pictures. He is so girly. Has he never thrown a fucking rock in Queens, New York? Has he never thrown a newspaper? Has he never finished a piece of gum and thrown it down the road or onto a roof? Has he never fucking thrown anything in his entire fucking life? A football? A frisbie? A bag of potato chips to his boys? His car keys to his chick? What’s even crazier is, inside his first album cover, he is holding a fucking bat. You’d think he’d be able to toss a fucking ball. Tonight, I will give a baby a fucking ball. A baby who has never thrown anything but her bottle across the room and she will still pitch better than that.

Nessa: I know lolololol. You can tell he has never thrown a thing in his life.

Ryan: This fucking guy probably has an allergic reaction even when he watches Game of THRONES.

Nessa: lol. His grandma probably called him up after seeing this pitch and demanded he give back the THROW blanket she bought him for Christmas.

Ryan: AHAHAHA. She still has stains on the rug and walls from when he was a kid and used to throw up fucking sideways.

Nessa: He probably throws up in 90 degree angles and hits the walls behind him even though his head is hanging in a toilet.

Ryan: He used to throw down with his homies and always hit his own boy that was standing next to him.

Nessa: Vegas would never ask him to throw a fight.

Ryan: Fight? You can tell he couldn’t throw a fucking punch if his life depended on it. Imagine him throwing a party though?

Nessa: He’d throw a party and give directions to his house… which leads everyone two blocks away to the left of his home, at some cameraman’s house.

50 cent batRyan: Ahahaha. The dude seriously throws like a sissy.

Nessa: The dude obviously didn’t pitch growing up. Must be a catcher.

Ryan: Ahaha. You better stop with that shit. This is 50 cent we are talking about. You’re going to end up staring down the barrel of a gun….

Nessa: And I’d never feel safer! LOLOL

Ryan: Hahaha. If he was aiming at the wall 20 feet away from you though?

Nessa: Fucking duck, you’re in trouble then.

Ryan: Ahahahahahahaahahaha.

Ryan: How are we supposed to believe he was on the corner “pitching rocks to the fiends.”

Nessa: Best drug dealer ever. The cops could never catch him pitching rocks directly to anyone.

Ryan: Ahahaha oh my god.

Ryan: There goes his career. He will be remembered for that pitch.

Nessa: For sure

Ryan: The pitch went viral before the game was in the 3rd inning. No bullshit.

Nessa: lmaoooo!  Sad! 50’s pitch went viral before the end of the Star Spangled Banner sang by 3rd grader Lindsey Jones from Queens Elementary.

Ryan: lol. It went viral before the ball hit the reporter standing 30 feet away from the plate

Nessa: It went viral before Fiddy even had the chance to think “Aww haiil naw”

Ryan: The ball accidentally hit a kid tweeting about the pitch in left center field

Nessa: lolol! It was like “Oh shit…here it co…” send tweet

Ryan: “OMG, you should see how bad this fucking pitch 50 just thre…”

Ryan: Next tweet. “Fuck, just got hit by the ball.”

Nessa: Upside down sit-ups can’t fix that weeble-wobble pitc–” tweet sent

Ryan: PLEASE 50, NEVER EVER EVER EVEREVEVEVEVEEVERE EVER do a drive-by. For the love of little kids on tricycles EVERYWHERE

Nessa: For the love of little kids on tricycles EVERYWHERE <– not necessarily “everywhere,” but at least in the tri-county area minimum.

Ryan: Haha.

Ryan: 50 is a humanitarian. He saw a mosquito with malaria on the camera man to the very far left and changed his mind about the pitch and decided to save him.

Nessa: 50 was pitching to the bat boy

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