Freaky Search Terms – forced facefuck swallow kick slap

ffst-300x200Freaky search terms, where we post our most outrageous search terms that people used to find our website.  Ryan and I will then share our own thoughts and hopefully entertain you guys or at least make the search term make a little less sense.

Each search term was gathered by wordpress and/or google statistics and they are all very real search terms.   Each search term was used by some person in the world that ended up on our page.

10. sensation felt when ass fucked
Ryan: Stick a finger or a cucumber in your ass, take notes.  Send us an email and let us know your results.
Venice: I think what Ryan is trying to say is, everyone has an ass, so if you are curious about the sensation, stick a finger in yourself and see what you feel. For me, feeling a finger in my ass does nothing more than give an extra sensation while having sex or being eaten out.  A penis is a bit different.  I feel my ass hole spread, I feel pressure, and even a feeling that I have to use the bathroom.  However, this sensation also feels highly sexual, depending on how horny I am.  Regardless, after working it in and the body gets used to the stretch and depth, the sensation is totally erotic. It makes me feel full and fucked, which I enjoy.  I don’t have sex with a man to not feel intense pressure or maybe even pain in my sexual regions.  I enjoy and want to feel a man drive himself inside me, and I want to gasp each time he thrusts.  For me, I would rather feel the slow, deep thrusts than the quick, shallow thrusts because it almost feels as if the back of my ass is connected to the G-spot in my vagina. With anal, the pressure stays intense. With the vagina, depending on my wetness and stretch, the pressure can lessen and it doesn’t feel as intense.
Ryan: Boring.
Venice: Screw you.
Ryan: Deal.
Venice: Okay, I’ll get my strap-on.
Ryan: No deal.
Venice: Exactly….pussy.
Ryan: 🙁

9. my wife let him cum in her after i said no
Venice: Ahahaha.
Ryan: That’s hilarious.

8. releasing of human sperm in a lady ass
Venice: Wtf?
Ryan: Yes, I’ve been wanting to Google this search term as well.
Venice: Yes, because there is no telling what you would get as a result if you didn’t add human.
Ryan: Indeed.

7. forced facefuck swallow kick slap
Ryan: Sounds like a damn Mortal Kombat move.
Venice:
Down on the joystick, then up, A + D
Ryan: Talk about a Fatality.  I can imagine a guy standing there and I hit down, then up, A+D and my character jumps on the other guy and face fucks him until he swallows, then kicks and bitch slaps him.
Venice: Or a Babality.  Maybe after you face fuck him he could throw up little baby versions of you?
Ryan:
Seriously, you need help.
Venice: Maybe as the waterfall of babies comes out of his mouth you could do the E. Honda chop and punch combo and slap them all in mid air.
Ryan: Never get an Asian started with video game ideas.  My fucking bad guys.

6. venice bloggs tube
Venice:
Are they asking to see my cock or something?
Ryan: I’d suck it.
Venice: Ugh, next search term please.
Ryan: What?  Would that be gay if I was already in love with you for 18 years and found out you have been hiding a cock all this time?
Venice: How the hell could I hide a cock for 18 years?
Ryan: I mean, you are Asian.
Venice: Well, that’s true.  🙁
Ryan: It’s too late at that point. I’d definitely suck your dick and love every second of it.
Venice: Love every second?  That’s just too extreme, I’m sorry.
Ryan: It’s too extreme because I’d love doing it?  I mean, you tricked me.  You got me.  All this time you had this cock and I didn’t know about. But what the fuck?  It’s too late for me to pack up at that point, I might as well just embrace your cockhood and teach you a thing or two about deepthroating.
Venice: Oh, I am going to get my toy now!
Ryan: Okay, now you are taking this shit too far.  I’m not sucking a pretend cock, that would just be extremely gay.
Venice: Oh God, you are so weird.
Ryan: Big difference…
Venice: …next search term please.

5. why does my stomach feel gross after being cummed inside of
Venice: It’s all in your mind.
Ryan: Or his semen is spoiled from sitting in his balls for hours. Probably looks like cottage cheese inside your stomach right now and your vagina smells like dirty bleach.
Venice: Ryan, you are going to ruin her.
Ryan: Probably morphed into an alien and is going to crawl out of your belly button in the next few moments.
Venice:
Ryan: What’s the chances that he ate some sort of poison that didn’t affect him at all but traveled to his prostate or balls waiting to be transferred to a woman’s stomach to infect her?!?
Venice: Very slim I’d say.
Ryan: Okay then, how about a parasite of some sort?  Maybe her boyfriend was swimming in the Amazon river and had a parasite crawl up his urethra?   It’s possible that as he ejaculated the parasite traveled with his semen inside this other girl and is attacking her stomach as we speak?
Venice: Technically, I guess that could happen.  Okay, listen, if your boyfriend has swam in the Amazon river in the last few weeks, you may want to get checked by a doctor out as soon as possible.
Ryan: She will probably be dead by the time we publish this.
Venice:
Okay Ryan, that’s enough.
Ryan:
Rest in peace person whose stomach felt gross after she was came inside of.
Venice: <sigh>

4. healthy ass cum pics
Ryan:
 Oh V, nice follow up search term placement!
Venice: I figured that would be a good search term following your parasite sperm story.
Ryan: Can you imagine the alternative to that search term?
Venice: diseased and spoiled cum pics…
Ryan: …and the woman who swallowed it and now her stomach hurts!
Venice: sperm with worms pics
Ryan: sperm that looks like puss
Venice: HIV sperm selfie
Ryan:  Ahaha at selfie!

3. how does deepthroating look like
Venice: What?
Ryan: What the inside of a throat looks like?

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Venice: Looks like a long slimy vagina…
Ryan: …You’re welcome…
Venice: …or the inside of a wet fleshlight.
Ryan: So yea, pretty much horny all the sudden.

2. i never knew my girl could deepthroat until she deepthroats another guy
Ryan:
Ha!  Classic!
Venice: What a way to find out your girls hidden talents.
Ryan: I never knew my wife could juggle 4 balls with her anus until I caught her having a threesome with 2 clowns at a circus behind the popcorn stand!  And then she tamed a lion to jump through a ring of fire covering her anus!
Venice:  Haha!  Girls always keep their hidden talents a secret until you catch them at the circus.  

1. my wife says my penis is small when soft
Venice:
As long as she doesn’t say it’s small when it’s hard, you’re safe.
Ryan:
Facts.

Freaky Search Terms: difference between a tight pussy and a pussy that has been fucked big time

ffst-300x200Freaky search terms, where we post our most outrageous search terms that people used to find our website.  Ryan and I will then share our own thoughts and hopefully entertain you guys or at least make the search term make a little less sense.

Each search term was gathered by wordpress and/or google statistics and they are all very real search terms.   Each search term was used by some person in the world that ended up on our page.

10) Free wife catches me sucking dick / free husbands getting caught sucking cock stories
Venice: Give US US OUR FREEDOMS!
Ryan: Amistad.   If you don’t get it, you don’t get us…
Venice: FREEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
Ryan:  Braveheart.  Boom.
Venice:  Cause I’m FREEEEEEEEE… FREEEEEEEEE FALLLLLL…
Ryan: Jerry Maguire.  Too easy.
Venice: Bullshit, you can be mine!
Ryan:  What the hell does that have to do with free?
Venice: So you don’t know?
Ryan: Top Gun.  Easy.  But what the hell does that have to do with free?
Venice: I’m free to use whatever quotes I want to bitch.
Ryan:  …
Venice:  Ha!  Gotttttem!

9) difference between a tight pussy and a pussy that has been fucked big time
Ryan: Well…
Venice: I got this one, Ryan. A tight pussy means she’s dry, unhorny, and not turned on, which means the guy didn’t do his job. He didn’t eat her out, there was no foreplay, and he just stuck his dick in her the same way he probably stuck his dick in a gym sock when he was a kid.  A pussy that has “been fucked big time” is just as “loose” as pussy that’s wet from her own juices from being turned on.
Ryan: Preach to him…
Venice: A pussy that has “been fucked big time” is just as “loose” as pussy that’s wet from her own juices from being turned on.
Ryan:  Amen!
Venice: Lord, save this demon from his evil misguided teenage thoughts of loose pussy!
Ryan: Good little sermon Venice, but you’re still tight as fuck though, wet or not.  Just saying.
Venice: Blasphemous… but thank you.  🙂

8) she had no idea i was recording us fucking porn
Venice: Oddly, we’ve never had anyone search “HE had no idea i was recording us fucking porn”
Ryan: Yea, because that would never happen.
Venice: This is how we fuuuuck.

7) suggestions on small penis teasing
Ryan: Okay, I will try a few suggestions.  “Well, I bet it’s bigger in a more natural lighting.  Let’s turn the lights off and see how it looks when neither of us can see it.”
Venice: Zzzzzzzzzzzz.   Are you done yet?   Maybe you should write that speech down on paper so you don’t forget it?
Ryan:  Well fuck, how about: “With a little bit of water, a little bit of sunshine, and a whole lot of love, I bet it will grow to be a big boy penis one day.”
Venice:  How about: “Damn your little ass cock looks like a cervix.”
Ryan:  Ugh.  Jumped a few steps there huh?
Venice: “Do you ever finger yourself when you are horny?”
Ryan:  Jesus.
Venice:  Uh huh, just keep your pants on when it’s cold out.  You don’t want none of this…
Ryan: … 🙁
Venice: Awww, want me to suck on your peepee and pretend to gag to make you feel bigger…I mean better?
Ryan: Wow, really?  Now you’re just being mean.  You wouldn’t gag on a fucking bat.
Venice: Yea, but I learned playing tee-ball with you Ryan.
Ryan: You’re damn right you did.
Venice: 🙂
Ryan:  Wait, I have no idea if that was an insult or a compliment, but I think it sounded good.
Venice: My little Louisville Tugger.
Ryan: Hmm..still kind of somewhere in the middle there.
Venice: Oh Ryan, you know you have a horse cock.
Ryan:  🙂
Venice: My little pony for sure!
Ryan:  Okay…thank you…and fuck you.  You can pick which response fits better than I can.  On to the next search term PLEASE.

6) are there any deepthroat porn videos where you can clearly see the dick in her throat
Venice: I hear you buddy. I’m not convinced the penis is actually going down her throat unless I can clearly see it.
Ryan: Truthfully, until I felt it myself, I didn’t know what deepthroating was either.  It’s one of those things that once you feel it, the tight hole in the back, the tighter throat, fuck. No blow job will ever be complete if a girl can’t give me that sensation.  I won’t lie.
Venice:  Like how you thought women peed from the same hole that the penis penetrates?
Ryan: Kind of embarrassing you are going to blog that, but yea, kind of like that.
Venice:  Rookie!
Ryan: Uh, you thought the same thing I did.  Don’t try to front for the blog!
Venice: I knew where my pee came from Ryan.  Try again.
Ryan:  Of course you did, you just didn’t know where my dick was going.  At all.  Rookie!
Venice:  They don’t teach that type of stuff in health class Ryan.  I blame the public school system!
Ryan: Well listen, let’s figure this out together.  Let’s load google and put in, “are there any sex porn videos where you can clearly see the dick in her vagina”
Venice:
I see what you did there Ryan.  Gooood…very good.

5) tears and jizz dripped on my balls as i facefucked the sobbing boy
Ryan:  Yay, story time!
Venice: Yes, gooooood.  Keep going.

4) wemen deepthroating the bigest dicks in the whole wide world
Ryan:
  Damn man.
Venice: I think our readers are size whores.
Ryan: Do you think?!

3) show a picture of man sucking a another man penis
Venice: This guy is very demanding isn’t he?  Where are his manners?
Ryan: He does seems extremely abusive to his search engine.
Venice: “please show a picture of man sucking a another man penis”
Ryan: Maybe he was talking to Siri?
Venice: “Siri, please show a picture of man sucking a another man penis”

2) deepthroat c** in her throat / c** drips out of a woman’s pussy into a man’s mouth
Venice: I hate it when people use talk to text to search.
Ryan: Why?
Venice: Because the censored word could be anything. “deepthroat cat in her throat”…?
Ryan: True. I’d be pretty impressed if someone found our site by searching “deepthroat cot in her throat.”
Venice: “cow drips out of a woman’s pussy into a man’s mouth”
Ryan: Ewwww!
Venice: Ewwww!

1) my wife is very good at deepthroating
Venice: Aww, that’s sweet of him to say that about his wife
Ryan: It’s like he just wants the Internetz to know that she’s good at deepthroating.

Freaky Search Terms: lets talk about our hairy balls

ffst-300x200Freaky search terms, where we post our most outrageous search terms that people used to find our website. Ryan and I will then share our own thoughts and hopefully entertain you guys or at least make the search term make a little less sense.

Each search term was gathered by wordpress and/or google statistics and they are all very real search terms.   Each search term was used by some person in the world that ended up on our page.

10) meaning of two woman doing a double blow job on male
Venice: That can only mean one thing: lucky!
Ryan: Amen.

9) i need a female ass i can look at while i rub my dick all nude
Venice: Well buddy, you’ve come to the right place!
Ryan: We’ve got a great selection of asses: round asses, jiggly asses, flat asses – you name it.
Venice: Ass is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey’s uh, ass-kabobs, ass creole, ass gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple ass, lemon ass, coconut ass, pepper ass, ass soup, ass stew, ass salad, ass and potatoes, ass burger, ass sandwich. That- that’s about it.
Ryan:
Venice: Yummy, so hungry all the sudden!

8) lets talk about our hairy balls
Venice: This sounds like a pamphlet at a doctor’s office.
Ryan: Right next to “The Human Penis: The Science Behind Your Sperm Tunnel”
Venice: And “Mommy, why do I cry on my period?”
Ryan: Don’t forget “Prostate Massages: The Inner Workings of Your Anus”

7) when i knew i was at the back of her throat i shot my load wow!
Venice: This guy’s reaction is great. It’s like he just wants to emphasize how excited he was. Tadoww!
Ryan: I know that feeling. I get it when I facefuck you. Shazam!
Venice: And similarly, I love facefucking. Zippadeedodah!

6) anal cum swallow being judged
Venice: This is a judge-free zone. If you swallow cum that came out of someone’s ass, no one will judge you.
Ryan:  I give your response a solid 9 Venice.
Venice: You give my response a solid 8 for sure.
Ryan:
Venice: Aww, are you blushing?
Ryan: Shutup.

5) tickle and fuck her good
Venice: Tickle? To me, getting tickled is very painful and excruciating. So how about no! For me that is like, “Punch her in the face with your hands dipped in glue and glass and then fuck her good”
Ryan: Or “Pull out her fingernails and teeth with pliers and then make slow sweet love to her”
Venice: Exactly!

4) why do penis tickle my vagina
Venice: Ok wait…is “tickle” slang for something?
Ryan: Kids these days. I can never keep up with the new lingo.
Venice: Ryan, your penis doesn’t tickle me, jack. I think it’s dyn-o-mite!
Ryan: Listen here, jive turkey. I can dig it.
Venice: Me too, sucka!

3) x-hamster struggle of baseball girl
Venice: Ouch! I saw one of these a long time ago. I wonder if that’s the same one.
Ryan: Probably not. I can’t imagine how many more chicks have stuck baseball bats in their vaginas on camera now, with cellphones and cam sites being commonplace.
Venice: “Baseball Girl 2: The 2nd Inning, 2 Balls No Strikes, Starring Lance Armstrong and Tom Green”
Ryan: “Baseball Girl 3:  The 3rd Inning, 3 Balls 1 Strike, starring Dan Abrams and Mr Hands.
Venice: “Baseball Girl 4: The 4th Inning, Baseball Girl vs. Pickle Jar Boy”
Ryan: Ouch.
Venice: I know right!
Ryan: “Baseball Girl 5: The 5th Inning, Balls and Bases Loaded”
Venice: “Baseballs Girl 6: The 6th Inning, Pitching A No Hitter, Girls Only Soft(balls) starring Caitlyn Jenner”
Ryan: I’d watch it.
Venice:You bet your ass we wood!
Ryan: I see what you did there, wood, baseball bat.  I’m catching what you’re throwing.
Venice: “Baseballs Girl 9: The 9th Inning Stretch, MANDINGO UP TO BAT”
Ryan: Ha!!!

2) my husband is cheating on me with a man but he has a big cock big cock gay sex porn
Venice: This term seems to imply that it would be okay for him to cheat because it’s gay sex.
Ryan: She also implies that it’s okay because one of them has a big cock. Like, if your cheating with an Asian, that relationship is OVER.
Venice: We definitely do not condone cheating, but guys, if you’re going to cheat, make sure he’s got at least 8 inches and above. If he doesn’t, you’re just a filthy man-whore.

1) my wife don’t want my dick she wants pig dick porn
Ryan: Looks like he’s been outdone by Babe.
Venice: She wants a little oinker in her Charlotte’s Web

Freaky Search Terms – wife wants a squirting dildo for me

ffst-300x200Freaky search terms, where we post our most outrageous search terms that people used to find our website.  Ryan and I will then share our own thoughts and hopefully entertain you guys or at least make the search term make a little less sense.

Each search term was gathered by wordpress and/or google statistics and they are all very real search terms.   Each search term was used by some person in the world that ended up on our page.

10) when do woman cum while being choked, right before passing out?
Ryan: I’ve heard after death. Most girls love it and would probably try it again if they could.
Venice: Yea, going out with a bang for sure.
Ryan: [insert disclaimer here]
Venice: We are not responsible for your stupidity.

9) straddle her face fuck her face head bang on bed post rape her face with big cock
Venice: These are the best. I really like seeing a detailed description of what a guy wants. Or girl.
Ryan: Almost as good as “Best ass gape in the world from a 10 inch girth pink dildo video”

8) after wife used large dildo she cant feel my dick
Ryan: What is, what all my ex’s next boyfriend complained about?
Venice:
Ha! Jeopardy?
Ryan: Large Dildo’s for 500 please.
Venice: What is…if she can’t feel your dick now, she probably never could.
Ryan:  Dang.  Game over.

7) is it same to swallow your own semen doctor
Venice: I’m not sure what he’s trying to say here: “Is it SAFE to swallow your own semen doctor” or “Is it SANE to swallow your own semen doctor”? Either way, the answer is yes.
Ryan: Sounds like he is asking us if he can swallow his semen doctor.
Venice: If that’s the case, the answer is no. You don’t know where his hands have been.

6) can i swallow my bf cum while being on coke
Ryan: I heard that if you swallow cum while you are on coke your stomach will explode.
Venice: Or Alka-Seltzer and pop rocks.

5) thots swallowing cum
Venice: If I would have seen this a few years ago, I would have assumed the questions was supposed to be “Thoughts on swallowing cum”
But in keeping up with slang from the internetz, a thot is an acronym for “that ho over there.” I think any woman who swallows your cum is a keeper, just my opinion.
Ryan: I’m not hip to this lingo.

4) menfuck chicken pet
Venice:
Our readers are disgusting.
Ryan:
Sick.
Venice:
Any more like this?
Ryan:
I don’t know, looking now.
Venice:
Okay good, find another one worse.
Ryan:  Hell yea.

3) how to fuck your wife with a small dick
Ryan: Rabbit style.
Venice: Yea, nothing like a small penis going rabbit style on your pussy.  Sounds like your creating a bunch of Don Juans Ryan.
Ryan:  Monkey Style.  I do that pussy like a Wu-Tang album.
Venice: Okay Ol’ Dirty Ryan.

2) wife wants a squirting dildo for me
Venice: I want one too!
Ryan: Uh, I don’t think so.  Unless they make a pinky squirting dildo, you can keep wanting it.  1 finger only girl.
Venice: Don’t worry, Ryan.
Ryan:  I’m not worried.
Venice: I would make flavored semen, like Strawberry Kiwi BLAST or Banana CREAMPIE. LOL
Ryan: Don’t you think that will make your face sticky?
Venice: Or yours.
Ryan: Negative.
Venice: You are about 2 seconds from being peed on right now if you don’t stop.
Ryan:

1) i stick my penis into my wife vagina whole night and sleep what happen in the morning
Ryan: Think Jack and the Beanstalk.  
Venice: Wait, are you saying that if you leave your penis in my vagina over night I will be able to grow a beanstalk into the bonus level, jump on clouds, and collect gold coins?
Ryan: No, I wasn’t saying that but… fucking awesome.
Venice: Warp zone bitch.
Ryan: And that’s why I love you.

Freaky Search Terms – Your Freaky Questions Answered

ffst-300x200Freaky search terms, where we post our most outrageous search terms that people used to find our website.  Ryan and I will then share our own thoughts and hopefully entertain you guys or at least make the search term make a little less sense.

Each search term was gathered by wordpress and/or google statistics and they are all very real search terms.   Each search term was used by some person in the world that ended up on our page.

10. how much can you swallow deepthroating
Venice: As much as your stomach can hold.  I don’t think a human male can have more semen in his body than a woman’s stomach can hold, even if she has a gastric band in place.
Ryan:  So, you’re saying maybe a robot from the future could possibly reach your limits?
Venice: No that wasn’t what I was saying at all.

9. does porn stars pussy be sore after fucking
Venice: That would depend on if you’re talking Houston 500.  I believe she fucked 600+ men in a day.  I’d say yes.
Ryan: I think porn star vaginas are made of titanium and they feel absolutely zero pain or soreness.  Their vaginas are immune to anything other humans feel.
Venice: So you finally got around to watching the Terminator DVD set I got you for Christmas huh?
Ryan: Yea, how did you know?
Venice: Just a hunch.

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