V’s Wet Inbox: Did I Have An Orgasm?

1I’ve never orgasmed with a partner or by myself and I feel like I should kind of give up ever achieving on, my partner feels pretty lacking since he can’t make me orgasm. I will note that it could be because of lack of experience on my part and I’ve only had three different partners. I do own a vibrator and I’m confused about something that happened. I was using it and I’m not sure if I was going too hard or fast? But fluid kind of just leaked/poured out of me. I know it wasn’t urine because it didn’t smell like it and the coloring didn’t resemble urine at all. Wasn’t sure I was squirting because everything I’ve looked up said it usually (if it happens at all) is when women orgasm and so I doubt it’s that since I’ve never actually had an orgasm before. Maybe I didn’t look for answers hard enough?? So I’m really confused and I don’t feel comfortable actually talking to a doctor about what happened.

Nessa’s response:
I used to not be orgasmic through sex, but like you I was also young. However, I have always been able to achieve an orgasm through masturbation, even as a young girl just laying in bed circling my clit with my fingers until I felt what I now know as a clitoris orgasm.  This was basically how I had orgasms my entire life until I hit my mid 30s. If I had and orgasm during sex (or before), I needed clitoral stimulation.  Whether it be with a tongue, fingers, or a toy.  Although I have never had issues with having orgasms with the proper stimulation.  And, although not hands free, I could always have orgasms during sex if I could get room to play with myself, or have him play with me while his penis penetrated. I believe these clitoral orgasms are similar to a man’s release.  The orgasms that make your neck red, your nipples swell, your body get goosebumps, and an explosion.  However, for me I never squirted.

Once I hit my mid 30s, I started having mini plateaus (orgasms) inside my vagina.  Although not as powerful as the orgasms I was used to, these orgasms definitely produced fluids and at times I would wet the bed.  My cervix also tenses and twitches on the inside, but I do not have the huge explosion that comes with clitoral orgasms.  These orgasms only happen during sex, especially when I am deeply penetrated.

Although I have squirted (spurts) multiple times, I’ve only had one instance where a very large amount of fluid pour out of me once.  Again, this was not a clitoral orgasm, but my body did drain a large amount of fluids.  This was recorded on video.  The fluid looked almost whitish, definitely not urine, and literally poured out of my body like a faucet (I couldn’t urinate like this even if I wanted to).  This one time was when used the “forklift” method of two fingers in my vagina as he lifts it up to put pressure on my gspot.  It felt amazing and at some point, my body sprung a leak.  Not squirting, not a spurt of fluid that stops, but literally he pulled out his fingers and I drained fluid all over the towel that was underneath me.  Now, again, I did not have an orgasm as if I was playing with my clit, but my inner body still went through all the physical motions (twitching, spasms).

I consider all of these orgasms different types of orgasms. Truthfully, I believe a lot of women may be orgasmic through sex but because sex is rough, friction, or they are not really in tune with the not-so powerful orgasms, they don’t notice, or they wait to feel the huge orgasm they get through clitoral stimulation.

With all that being said, I do not think you have anything to worry about!  Congratulations on your first plateau orgasm!  It only gets better now!


V’s Wet Inbox – My Cervix Is Bruised?!

cervix painLast night my partner and I were having sex. It was a little rougher than usual in a position that often hurts my cervix. We changed to a more comfortable position after a few minutes, but the damage was already done, and I got a horrible cramp in my entire lower abdomen that brought me to tears. It eventually stopped hurting severely, but I’m still tender today. If it continues, I’ll absolutely see my doctor, but I’m just wondering if you or any of your readers have experienced this? ovarian cyst

Yes, I have experienced this myself many times. Although the pain can be debilitating; fortunately, it doesn’t last for more than 24-36 hours, and can even dissipate after about 12. From personal experience, I believe this cervical pain is caused by certain factors.

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Q&A: Question About FFM Threesomes

threeI’m the male in this situation. I have had a few threesomes. This one is planned and I have logistical questions.

One girl I have unprotected sex with. One girl I have to use a condom with. How do I do this exactly? Should I fuck one, then the other, and try not to switch back? Do I clean myself inbetween? What do I clean myself with? Do I switch back and forth with a new condom every time?

Is there a guide for positions? The last couple times the girls were not bi and I had trouble coming up with good positions. They kept expecting me to tell them what to do and it’s hard commanding two girls when they do not want to touch each other. That will probably happen again at some point so could I have suggestions for positions for a threesome with two girls who are not bi and the current situation in which they are?

Sometimes they will be confused on how to do something. Is there a good generic answer for this? One common one is a double blowjob. They don’t know where to position themselves. What do I tell them?

These new girls, thankfully, are into each other. I think probably more than they are into me.

They made me buy restraints so if any ideas include those in the positions, that would be great. Silk ties.

Starting it is also always weird too. They always look to me to initiate it, but then they resist me encouraging them. I think I will try suggesting they do things to each other? 

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Q&A: My Boyfriends Balls Smell Awful, Even After Showering

balls smellMy boyfriend’s balls smell so bad. He showers every day and washes himself down there but it doesn’t seem to help. He sweats a lot in general so I asked him to start using talcum powder but that hasn’t helped at all.

It’s so bad that when he does a load of laundry and some of his boxers are in there, everything comes out smelling like his balls. Kind of a musky sweet vinegary scent. It’s nasty. The laundry is hanging up to dry in the bedroom right now and I had to open a window because the entire room now smells like his balls.

If he scratches or touches his balls, his hand smells disgusting after. Sometimes we are cuddling an watching a movie and I say “did you just scratch your balls? your hands smell” and he says yes.

I’ve seen him wash his junk in the shower and it seems like he does a pretty good job: he lathers soap everywhere with his hands (even in his butt crack) and washes thoroughly. But even right after showering, there is a slight funk still there.

This is my first sexual relationship so maybe that’s normal?

I’m starting to think maybe he has some sort of fungal or bacterial issue going on? I really really don’t think he will go to the doctor about this because he’s too proud and that’s an embarrassing issue.

Is there anything else we can try before I beg him to see a doctor? Maybe simply washing with soap isn’t enough? Should I buy him a washcloth? Some sort of antibacterial soap?

Any advice would be great.

Nessa’s response:
We all sweat, but some more than others and in higher, more voluminous concentration of “musk.” Is odor normal? Yes! We’ve all got our own odor, scent, musk…whatever you want to call it – that is just as unique to us as a fingerprint. When I get home from work and give Ryan a hug, he knows my scent. I don’t work outdoors; I stay in an air conditioned building all day. When my daughter borrows my clothes, she’ll often say, “This shirt smells like you, mom.” And I feel that way about them. I know their smells when I hold them, when they kiss me, when they walk past me.

However, by the way you describe it, your boyfriend is just too much for you to handle. There are steps you can take to keep this odor in your living area down to a minimum. Grooming and shaving can help with odors. Make it an event and shave his balls. Not only will it help with the smell, but shaving itself is done by lathering up the area with soap, and then getting a good clean scrape of the area with a razor to get rid of the hair. You then follow up with a thorough rinsing. I never feel more fresh than when I am newly shaved because I spend more time than usual in that area to really get it prettied up.  I would also try to wash his clothes as soon as he is done wearing them as the odor will linger. I’ve also heard that changing your diet can help, i.e. cutting down on spicy and/or flavorful foods, red meats. From experience, I found that foods with fewer ingredients were less likely to upset my stomach and therefore keeping my stomach more “clear.” The same goes for red meat. I don’t know why, but chicken does not have the same effect on me.

Because our bodies have so many crevices and sweat glands, grooming can be even harder for someone like your boyfriend. But it may not even be his fault. It could be a medical condition that neither of you are aware of which is why it is difficult for you to fix. Keep a log of the methods he’s tried to combat this problem and see a doctor, if this is really something that you both feel is beyond your control.

Ryan’s response:
If my balls smelled like vinegar I’d see a doctor immediately. That’s serious business in my book! I can nearly cut off my finger and won’t go to the doctor because who really needs 10 fingers anyway right?  I can get my leg caught in the lawn mower and still try to walk it off. Who really needs two legs? I’ll just buy a pogo stick and hop around. But if there is a problem with my balls, smell or otherwise, I am going to the doctor immediately. No pogo stick is going to replace those.  I do not want anything wrong with my package and I like to think I take great care of it. Have him visit a doctor to see what is going on. Other than dipping his balls in bleach or spraying his nuts with Febreze, I really do not see an easy fix to your problem if soap is not working.

Q&A: My Husband Wants To Eat An Apple That Sits In My Vagina All Day

apple-or-a-couple_2018271aQuick back story. Our relationship hasn’t been quite ideal, and in hopes of trying to save it, and spark some flames, I agreed to do whatever my husband wanted to help spice things up again.

Recently, he asked me to stick different things in my vagina, like apples, pears, carrots, etc.. and keep in there all day so that he could eat them at night when he came home from work.

I have gone along with it, thinking it would be something like a one time thing or so, but its been almost two months, and he shows no signs of wanting to stop.

I am not sure if anyone else has done this, and if so, what was you r experience? One of my concerns is, his and my health, can this make him or I sick? The fruits we buy are organic, and I spend a good deal cleaning them thoroughly. apple vagina apple vagina

Nessa’s response:
Actually, although this is the first of me hearing of this, I think it’s a pretty neat idea. Anything that a couple does to reinvigorate their relationship should be something that they both embrace and agree to doing. Ryan and I discuss intimacy/sexual ideas and we are both pretty quick to answer “yes” to each other, sometimes without getting all the details. But that’s how we operate.

It looks like you’re taking the proper precautions with buying organic and cleaning the edibles thoroughly. I’ve seen a lot of pictures that showed people sitting on banisters, using cell phones, baseball bats, gear shifts, and animal penises for vaginal pleasure – all questionable and/or illegal. I encourage staying away from those types of objects.

If it’s been several months and you haven’t gotten sick, you must be doing something right with how you’ve gone about this with you and your significant other. My only concern (to anyone curious in trying this), is to “build up” an immunity to the pH and acidity of the fruits and vegetables used. If I were to do this, I would definitely use organic foods for health reasons (insecticides). I would clean it thoroughly with water (no “vegetable wash”). I would use small portions with smoothed edges and no corners. Lastly, I would work my up to a full day, probably by doing a fruit insertion sometime after lunch, if things go well, add an hour every few days. That’s how I would do it.

Bon appetite!

Ryan’s response:
The sugars from the apple can be a good source for the bacteria in your vagina to grow, which will throw off your vagina’s natural pH balance.  This can cause Bacterial Vaginosis, urinary tract infections, or yeast infections.  This doesn’t even include the possible contaminants that may be on the actual skin of the fruit from being handled prior to you purchasing it.

I have no idea how healthy it would be for him though, to eat a fruit that you have held in your vagina all day. I’d assume keeping a fruit at body temperature for a full day, just wouldn’t be healthy. That sounds like the perfect environment for bacteria to grow, but I am not farmer.

With all that being said, I’d do it. I’d love to eat an apple that Nessa kept in her body all day. I’m pretty sure and apple wouldn’t fit or be comfortable at all though, so maybe a lollipop that sits inside her all day. I find that idea extremely erotic and intimate. I find anything that may be risky or uncommon a bit sexy and tempting. It makes me want to test myself to see how much I love Nessa. As dumb as that sounds, that is why we do so many things that others find unusual. I think it would be worth the risk of getting sick just to try it once.

That probably isn’t the best answer in the world, but sexy is dirty, and we do all types of dirty things with the person we love because it’s fun and intimate. The more crazy it gets, the closer you two get. The rest of the world almost gets locked out, because you’ve done something most of the world would never try. apple vagina