Q&A: Question About FFM Threesomes

threeI’m the male in this situation. I have had a few threesomes. This one is planned and I have logistical questions.

One girl I have unprotected sex with. One girl I have to use a condom with. How do I do this exactly? Should I fuck one, then the other, and try not to switch back? Do I clean myself inbetween? What do I clean myself with? Do I switch back and forth with a new condom every time?

Is there a guide for positions? The last couple times the girls were not bi and I had trouble coming up with good positions. They kept expecting me to tell them what to do and it’s hard commanding two girls when they do not want to touch each other. That will probably happen again at some point so could I have suggestions for positions for a threesome with two girls who are not bi and the current situation in which they are?

Sometimes they will be confused on how to do something. Is there a good generic answer for this? One common one is a double blowjob. They don’t know where to position themselves. What do I tell them?

These new girls, thankfully, are into each other. I think probably more than they are into me.

They made me buy restraints so if any ideas include those in the positions, that would be great. Silk ties.

Starting it is also always weird too. They always look to me to initiate it, but then they resist me encouraging them. I think I will try suggesting they do things to each other? 

Nessa’s response:
I think it’s important to respect the girls’ wishes when it comes to protection. The one that you can have unprotected sex with has no issues, but the one you have to wear a condom with is the one you have to worry about. I assume they both will be giving you oral sex at one point or another, it’s just a question of will the one asking you to wear a condom do it after you remove the condom. Condoms have their own taste/smell, so it depends on if she doesn’t mind that. If they are not bi, then I have to wonder if either of them will give you oral sex if it’s been in the other girl, especially the one who doesn’t require the condom. If you can switch back and forth, I would definitely put a new condom each time because you don’t want to risk tearing it. There are so many factors here. So many, that you really should have a talk with them both and find out what they prefer and what they’re comfortable doing.

For girls who are not bi, I don’t think it’s a matter of positions, but rather what the one who is not active in the sex act is doing. So, if one is riding you, the other can sit on your face; if you’re missionary with one, the other can be using a toy (dildo) on herself; if you’re doggy with one, you can finger the other; if you’re eating out one, the other can suck your dick.

For girls who are bi, there are much more possibilities as you can do all of the above positions, plus have them both on you, you and one on the other, you taking turns on both – it’s less restricting to be with two girls. But, as with any sexual partner(s), I would clarify what each are comfortable doing, i.e. exchanging body fluids, anal, ATM, etc. All important to discuss, in my opinion, especially if you want to have another threesome with the both of them again. The use of restraints can be done to tie you down so they can do what they want with you or on one/both of the girls. Again, you’ll need to talk to them about what they’re into (pain, bruises, spanking, the use of a safety word, to name a few).

As with any partner(s), you will have to feel them out. If they’re hesitant, they may be nervous or they may just look to you to jump start the situation. Every woman has her own preference; having two at the same time will require constant adjustments. What works with two bi girls in a situation may not work for two other bi girls. The key is not to assume. “These other two girls I did this with loved it when I did this.” Even straight, monogamous people have to discover their lovers, each person in a multi-lover situation is not any different.

Ryan’s response:
The condom logistics is something I have always dealt with. There are multiple reasons for what I do. I cannot fuck the girl that I am using a condom on until after Nessa (in your case, the female you can have unprotected sex with) has enjoyed eating out the other girl. The reason being, the vagina will smell like condom and her deep inner juices will be all over her her labia and thighs (not something Nessa wants to eat and deal with when we barely know the other woman). It probably also isn’t that safe. If you are using a condom, I assume it’s because you want to make sure you are safe because you are unsure about the other woman’s sexual history or bill of health (if it’s purely a pregnancy thing in your situation, then my reasoning won’t fit your situation). So logistically speaking, Nessa and the other girl can play with each other first, while Nessa is totally on limits as far as penetration.  If I put on a condom, Nessa will usually not give the other woman oral sex afterwards.

It’s not as safe, and who knows what man has came in the other woman hours/the day before.  Unlike the third, she knows what she is getting into because she is there to enjoy both of us. However, we are not there to enjoy her and whatever men/man she has been with prior. We can’t assume she only plays with us, simply because 9 times out of 10, these women joining couples are really, really enjoying their promiscuous lifestyle. I am not judging them, but I also am not diving face first between their legs to taste them. Nessa and I centralize oral sex around the clit area and steer clear of the hole or the woman’s insides. I know that doesn’t sound as sexy, but unless we are with someone more exclusive, we steer clear of her insides.

Once I put on the condom, I will usually penetrate for about 5 minutes or so, to give the other woman the sensation of being fucked and to experience how she reacts and feels. Although I’d love to reenact a porn and be the ultimate stud, usually this is the most anticlimactic experience of our threesomes.  Whether it’s the numbing condom, the half erection, the foreign smells, or just me not being able to relax, there isn’t anything “great” about this part of our threesomes. Once I stop, I take off the condom, wash off the condom smell the bathroom, and come back out fresh. While I am away, the girls usually play with each other and do whatever it is they want to do. When I come back, I can again penetrate Nessa or get oral from both, but will no longer penetrate the third. We have yet been with a third that doesn’t eat Nessa off my dick after I fuck her, or not try to fuck Nessa with their tongues. I assume because they know who Nessa’s man is, they themselves are actually getting fucked by her man, that they just do not care about her insides being in their mouths. That would be their prerogative and not something I discuss with them.  However, putting on another condom and moving to a new position would just be too much of a buzzkill, so once is enough.

As far as your issues with having a threesome with 2 women that are not bisexual, I cannot help you there. Not only has this never been something I have dealt with, Nessa would not be okay with having a threesome with a woman that just wanted to fuck me. Everything we do is as a couple, beneficial to both of us, not just something one of us enjoys while the other is just there. That’s how this entire process started for us, so we stick to our rules of making sure each of us get what we want…and that’s another woman. If the other woman isn’t bisexual, then that other woman isn’t joining us in the bedroom.

Sorry that I can’t help with all the questions regarding positions, or how to deal with straight women. This just isn’t something I have experience or knowledge on.

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